Tomorrow Never Dies

Since I have been a proponent in the ancient art of delaying things, I thought I might very well design a course for it after having seen and slept through various courses in college. This is a rough draft of how a course plan on this art form would look like:

For all those who worship laziness this is my tribute

Procrastination 101

Course Code : Dilly Dally 101- D101D 
[ in the land of palindrome-speak, loosely translated - language called malayalam, the author wishes to acknowledge his obsession with palindromes with an innovative course code]

Prerequisites : Laziness (the  inherent sixth sense in most people, at least in my college)

Guidelines:

Later is a period of infinite span in the Procrastination dictionary it may range anywhere between few hours later to, um...well until death.

Soon in the Procrastination dictionary refers to a period somewhere in the near future just before the deadline.

Usage:

• Details regarding the course plan shall be put up soon
• Students attending this course should fill out the registration form and register sometime later.

Course Outline

Module 1:  Procrastination through history, Procrastination through ages, the essential procrastination vocabulary- Later, Eventually, I'm busy right now, Let's see , There is nothing wrong with the way it is now..,New additions -aal izz well, the act of forgetting due dates, submissions

Module 2: Procrastination in modern age : Internet- a procrastinator's paradise, the tools for procrastination-  Social Networking- facebook - the art of spamming other's walls, orkut, the most gripping form of procrastination yet-twittcrastination - procrastination enabled by twitter, Other addictive tools - PSP, blogging, free messaging services (subject to service availability, applies to college students only), Playstation, DOTA

Update: The newest avatar of Procrastination yet: Google Buzz, Ladies and Gentlemen, take a bow


Module 3: Common phrases used in the eleventh hour, Damn it! - the essential addition to the procrastination vocabulary, list of things/tools/objects that you could throw around yelling damn it! , Probability of the fact that the object thrown = object needed, frustration, the act of yelling at everything to melt down your frustration

Module 4: Fake words used to prevent procrastination - just do it (courtesy of nike, probably), Widespread applications - the ease of break ups due to procrastination, improving skills at plagiarising assignments, homeworks, stress time skills - the art of creating presentations on the night before the deadline

List of Textbooks and References to be published soon.

Famous Quotations:

I took Procrastination 101 in college and the teacher would walk in everyday and say, "Yeah! We'll do something tomorrow"

-Russell Peters in Show me the funny

[No copyright infringement intended here]



P.S : I had a plan to post the above blogpost a lot earlier, sorry for the inevitable delay due to twittcrastination

P.P.S: I know this tests your patience, but stating the mandatory disclaimer- No offence is intended to any individual(s) or organisation  by the means of this post

P.P.S : Recently I've been diagnosed with HCD (the Human Commento -Deficiency) Virus, (a variant of desperate attention seeker virus, in non medical terms) To cure me of this illness please leave a comment, I shall be eternally grateful.